i wanna scream, i wanna shOut, i wanna punch sumone, i wanna kiick sumone .. i wanna CRY! i feel so stoOpid .. nvm .. lets see if syed comes online later .. i guess i shld tell him sumtiing .. yea .. i mean, i am his fren (emphasis on the wOrd fren).. n yea .. its stoopid 2 tink tad we'd have been more den frenz .. so yea .. i'll talk 2 hiim IF he comes online .. if not den nvm ..

sumtyms, liife is totally sucky .. yes it is .. i mean how horrible can a bdae get? though i get irritated with him, i still fiind it realli saddening 2 see his bdae bein destroyed lyk tad .. haiz .. on his bdae! tad so sux! i was so sad when he told mii wad had happened .. n let mii remind u, i dun exactly lyk tiis guy .. i mite even get a little emotional when i see him up thr on thurs .. if they go on wiith it, tad is (n im prayin they wun) ..

nadzi .. the lame n lovely nadzi .. she .. aiyo! haha .. n sean .. stoopid, irritatin n swiit sean .. aaahh! it all started wiith nadzi n her matchmakiing .. saying we'd make a GREAT couple .. pollutiing my mind .. ish .. *shakes headd* but i wun listen 2 tad n i wun tiink abt it .. i dun wanna risk getting hurt again .. n i especially dun wanna risk getting my hopes high, tinking tad he actually lyks mii alot n blahh blahh blahh .. den later get my heart broken n my dreams destroyed ..

i juz realised tad i still have alot of anger n hatred vented up inside mii .. but how can i not hate wads goin on now? how can i not be mad?
LOVE; most wonderful.

everyone is haviing prOblems .. family probs, relationshiip probs .. n i juz wanna take it all away frm them .. y do guys have 2 hurt gals? y do guys have 2 be so fickle minded? y dun guys lyk the gals with the great characters instead of the gals wiith the loOks? why cant parents be more understandiing? y cant they be more patient n thoughtful? y cant everyone be problem free?

nadzi n jac made mii realise tad maybe i wasnt imagining stuff n they helped mii beliff in myself .. sean .. sean made mii feel special .. haha .. though it wasnt exactly intentionaly i guess .. but he did .. n finally syed, after talkiing 2 him abt sum personal stuff, i felt much better .. thx guys 4 all the help .. love u all .. :)
LOVE; most wonderful.

nthin 2 do .. nthin 2 wriite .. been sitting in front of the comp 4 the past 3 hours or so .. den one by one, my 2 neighbours came up .. juz now, eddie talked 2 mii .. super lame lar he .. he lives in the block opposite mine .. so i asked him wich floor he lives in .. he said 6 .. so i told hiim 2 go 2 his window n wave at mii .. den when i went 2 my window, he was already thr .. den we both wave our arms wildly .. haha .. tads the result of putting 2 lame ppl 2gether .. :) sean wrote mii a lame testi insultiing mii- as usual .. -_____-''' i guess he cant liive without insultiing mii .. painted my tOenails red .. blOod red .. looks pretty cool .. haha ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

currently, i lurve the songgs mockingbird n lyk toy soldiers by eminem .. i've got a gazillion pimples popping out .. haiz .. slept at 10 ytd while readiing a boOk .. was 2 sleepy 2 eat dinner .. woke up at 10.15 tis morning when i heard the telephone riing .. it was xiao xuan n she wanted mii 2 come 2 skl 4 eldds practise .. said i'll try 2 be thr by 11 .. walked 2 the room n realised tad i had perfect vision .. tads when i realised tad i had slept with my contacts on .. thot of weariing it 2 skl without taking it out but decided against in cos its not goOd 2 wear ur contacts 2 long plus i had already worn it 4 the whole nite .. (thank god my eyes din swell up) reached skl b4 11, was realli shagged cos i was still tired, my body was achiing, i was pmsing n having cramps .. went home straight after tadd .. had no appetite so bought a packet of milo n i've been spending the whole day in frOnt of the comp .. felt hungry juz now so made maggi cos 1) im 2 lazy to go down n 2) cos i had no appetite so i dun realli feel lyk eatiing muchh .. tad always happens duriing 'tad tym' of the mth- i loose my appetite .. at ard 6, apek tried 2 prank mii .. lyk im tad stoopid .. haha .. i knew he was jOkin all along .. budden at one tym he seemed so serious, i got freaked out .. haha .. ended up calling syed n we talked abt life n stuff .. at least 2dae, i din end up getting frustrated with him 4 not talking much .. actually, it was quite a pleasure talkiing 2 syed .. we talked 4 roughly 45 mins b4 he had 2 go .. im currently having a sore throat .. the change in my voice is actually quite nice .. i was getting abit sick with my voice .. haha .. i sort of miz camp .. its 8.30 now n im all alone at home .. its pretty boriing .. thOugh its more peaceful cos jacob isnt ard .. rite .. i cant tink of anytiing more 2 type abt .. so yea .. bye ..

to nadzi n xinni:
if u are readiing tis, wud u plz update ur blogs!!! i wanna hear abt the camp frm ur point of view .. alrite? yay! haha .. :)
LOVE; most wonderful.

WARNING: TIS IS A LONG ENTRY

alrite .. so i went 4 the sec 3 camp .. n as expceted, i had a ball .. it was really fun .. it wasnt lyk most of the camps i went 2 cos all the stuff we did were adventure stuff .. lets recall eh?

1st day:
sec 3d had the whole bus all 2 ourselves n we were making alot of noise .. when we reached the campsite n finally settled down in the hall, they gave us a quick briefing den, they assigned us our student leaders .. at first, our SLs werent sean n ali n i was tinkin tad it wud be kind of fun 2 have them as sec 3d's SLs .. n den my thoughts came true .. when sec 3e left with our supposedly SLs, i looked at sean n he grinned at mii evily .. tad bitch! haha .. i asked him y he was taking 3d instead of 3e n he said its cos he saw mii n wanted 2 take 3d .. lame .. *roll eyes* went 2 our huts 1st 2 put down our stuff n den met again in the hall 2 do orienteriing .. ended up being grouped with nadzi, colin n booncai .. we found 4 out of 6 clues .. we walked n sweated ALOT n mii, being lazy 2 carry a water bottle, got thirsty 2wards the end of the game .. tads when i saw sean n ali walking 2wards us with tis huge bottle of water .. n sean was swit enuff 2 share with mii his water .. aaaaww! but the switness was short lived .. after orientering, we had high elements 1 i tiink .. casey was brilliant .. he was realli good at everytiing .. i was the 1st gal in my cls 2 do it n it was pretty ok .. at 1st, when i got 2 the top, it was slightly jarring, i mean the height n all .. sean kept sayin tad i was gonna fall n stuff .. *hmph* when i reached the other end, sean n ali insisted tad i walk back .. n so i did .. when i reached the other end, the made mii walk back AGAIN .. so altogether, i walked along the "log" 4 tyms .. all thx 2 sean n ali who seemingly loves mii 2 bits n peices .. y? cos sean kips insulting mii n when i complain 2 ali, he juz smiles his colgate smile n says tad actually, sean is complimenting mii .. yea yea, n im queen elizabeth .. *roll eyes* did the broken brigde tiing as well n tried abit of belaying .. altogether, i bathed 3 tyms on tad day itself ..

2nd day:
as usual, sat next 2 fiq n his "sidekick", eugene, in the hall .. the food was alrite .. managed 2 take a bathe in the morning .. had basic n general elements followed by canoeing .. we were late 4 lyk 15 min n mrs yong made us do 25 pumping n sit ups .. but she walked away b4 we could finish, so we ended up doin very little n ran down 2 meet her again .. canoeing was fun .. i patnered nadzi n she was really relaxing n poor ali, he had panny as his patner .. sean deserved getting janice cos she kept nagging at him the whole tym abt badd coordination .. haha .. serve him rite .. sean kips insultiing mii .. he says all kindds of stoopid stuff n den he kips talking abt my boobs .. retarded .. den later he'll nudge mii n apologise .. den he'll make fun of mii again .. n all along, ali was standing thr n smiling .. haiz .. so sadd ..whenever i ask guys y they lyk 2 make fun of mii they say its cos my reaction is farni .. farni? rite .. -_____-''' anw, sean i n spent alot of tym insultiing each other .. i juz dun get him .. y insult mii? thr is iza, colin, nadzi, priscilla, serene .. but y mii? swit little mii *giggles* the onli person he makes fun of is MII!!!! haiz .. anw, mii, iza n jac were pmsing .. so we were all pissing each other off .. haha .. alrite, after canoeing, we swam in the water 4 awhile den, we had a shower .. wich was of no use cos we had high elements 2 after tadd .. tried everytiing n once again, casey was brilliant .. kept pesteriing sean 2 admit tad he lyks janice (the express one) but tad idiot ended up screaming at the top of his lunggs tis, "i dun lyk JANICE! i lyk HANNAH!" aaahh! so humiliatiing! n the whole csl turned ard n stared at us n went," oooohhhh." aaahhh! paiseh!!! had lunch n den we had zip line .. was the 2nd 2 go .. n it was FUN! iza went 1st after i forced her .. muahaha .. had fun cheering 4 ppl .. after the zip line, we had er .. absailing! yes! tad was a peice of cake .. lookin up frm below, everyone seemed 2 have super long leggs .. i din wanna go so soon, but ali came 2wards mii smiling n holding a harness n a helmet .. i was lyk, "u smiling at mii ar?" n he was lyk, "yea." so i rolled my eyes n tok the harness .. sean n ali ALWAYS come 2 mii 1st 2 ask mii 2 do sumtiing .. goodness .. *sigh* n while i was coming down, sean couldnt resist the urge 2 tell mii tad the ropes were goin 2 break under my weight n i was gonna fall SPLAT! on the ground .. i screamed at him 2 shut up .. didnt bother bathing cos the camp fire was next .. i was realli hyper by den .. we did our cheer, wich totally sucked, cos half way through, we screwed up on the words n we ended up screaming .. but i dun tiink anyone noticed cos it was pretty convincing! haha .. went n draw lots after tad n unlucky mii, picked the number one .. argh! n we din prepare an item n 5 mins b4 our item, serene gave mii an idea .. 4 further details, plz refer 2 iza's blog .. :) after the cheer, sean n i actually managed 2 talk normally without insultiing each other n we actually complimented each other .. haha .. i was still super hyper so mii, nadzi, di, sean n ali did alot of crazy stuff .. when kin onn asked 4 a maroon totally 90 shoe, ali threw his shoes 2 the front n sean passed it 2 mii n he told mii 2 run, so i ran n kin onn was lyk, "tad was pretty fast." duh! im a great runner ok .. hehe .. after tad, wanted 2 go over 2 the boys bunk but yong n kwan threatened spot checks so,yea .. wasnt able 2 do tadd .. bathed n den xinni n di came over .. it was alredi cramped in our hut n they wanted 2 slp thr .. it ended up, mii n diyanah grabbed our sleeping baggs n went back 2 di's hut 2 slp ... n boy, did i slp ..

3rd day:
woke up at 6.05 .. late! was suppose 2 meet at 6.15 4 breakfast duty .. i managed 2 drag iza n di n we were on tym .. the rest who were late got scolded .. later, thng gathered 3c n d n made us do 30 pumping .. 30! argh!!! i detest pumpiing .. had rock climbing after tadd .. din go up cos i was 2 chicken though sean kept egging mii 2 go .. cheered 4 the 3b ppl cos they were doin high elements 1 .. later, sean n ali came n sat next 2 mii n we talked 4 awhile b4 sean started raining insults on mii .. i walked away .. ended the camp cleaning toilets .. fuck man .. i mean, arent gals suppose 2 be the cleaner gender .. but no! they are so not! u shld have seen the toilet man! argh! everyone was so grossed out .. 4 futher gory details, come ask mii .. the teachers muz realli hate us 2 make us clean toilets .. went backk 2 skl .. sat in cls 4 awhile .. b4 leaving, asked syed 4 a hug .. but he kept sayin no nid .. nvm nvm .. u good lar syed .. went 2 tiong .. sat thr 4 abt 2 hours ..


juz wanna let everyone noe tad sean, the shoulder spasm boy, is an irritant .. :) n ali has such white teeth! during the whole camp, i only hated u 2 tyms 4 lykin her ..


if u guys readiing tis now, plz tagg my board 2 tell mii tad u're read tis extremely looong entry .. n congrats 2 .. haha .. hope it wasnt boring .. :)
LOVE; most wonderful.

yesterday's SS test was tOtally cool .. ms nim came in during the 2nd half of the test 2 relief mdm rOsy .. n when she came in she saidd, "try, try ur best not 2 cheat." den we all asked her if we could cheat n she said juz try our best .. but in the endd, we ended up cheatiing n during the last 15 mins, we had a discussion of the answers .. hehe .. ms nim so rox man!!! anw, back 2 the present, i realise tad i lyk 2 read blogs whr ppl use proper english .. cos sumhow, it makes the the entries more interestiing n understandable .. yea .. so now, i shall move on 2 blood boiling issues .. sumtyms i dunno wads her freakin prob .. at least im proud 2 say tad im the matured one here .. [bhb:)] i mean she can give snide remarks n comments .. but if she dare say it in malay cls or when she's alone den say lar .. but, she only does it when she's in a grp .. how pathetic is tad? very .. as 4 mii .. i wun stoop down 2 such a low level .. i juz act as if she's sumone i dunno .. i dun even bother lookin at her .. n he .. he is another one .. im not going 2 say anytiing abt him .. becos its mean n if i do say anytiing, i noe its gonna be offending .. im juz waiting 4 him 2 come 2 mii .. den we'll have a "little" chat .. i hate u 4 lyking diyanah .. i dun realli hate u .. i juz hate wad u're doing .. but does wad i say realli matter? its not as if it'll change tiings .. im juz fed up n frustrated .. u're so full of lies .. tell mii, doesnt it ever make u tired? lyin n lyin .. especially lyin 2 mii .. cos i noe tad u noe, tad i will find out wads goin on eventually .. r u tired now? r u realli tired? cos if u're tired, y not juz sit down n tell mii everyting now huh? no more lies .. juz tell mii everytiing ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

went 2 church .. sat in frOnt of lanz, joshua n gang .. they were really noisy .. but it was fun .. lanz n joshua look super cute!! aaahh! i miz goin out with ben, cheryl, joel, lanz n josh .. the first tym i went 2 escape was with them .. the first tym i went bowling was also with them .. n i knew lanz since i K2 n joshua since pri 1 .. cheryl n jOel when i was in sec 1 n ben tan when i was in pri 4, i tiink .. they were my childhood frenz .. n of course .. thr are my neighbours .. prema, philip n thilaga .. i've known them since i was in pri 3 .. me, philip, prema n jacob used 2 play at the playground downstairs everyday n i used 2 wear all these spagetti tops n mini skirts .. when i fell down frm rollerbladiing, my skirt wud fly up .. despite the hot n humid weather, i always left my hair down -it was pretty long back den .. i rmbr when thr was tis tym when prema "abandoned" mii 2 go with tis grp of indian guyys .. i was realli pissed n i called her a bitch .. we din talk 4 a few days n we ended up being frenz again after a few tears were shed .. :) i rmbr tis guy, kani raja .. i din lyk him back den so i called him a cow (cOs he loOked ly one) .. i also called him pandi raja, wiich means pigg raja .. haha .. but now tad we've all matured, i got 2 noe him better n found out tad he's a realli swit guy .. he's currently goin on with prema .. n they look so cute 2gether! haha .. when i heard tad raja wud be "leaving" 4 awhile, i was sad .. he is one of the switest guys i noe .. haiz .. i guess im gonna miz him in a way .. u may be tiinkin "y is hannah all these stuff abt her childhoOd?" well, its cos 2dae is prema's bdae n it reminded mii of my childhood ..


tmr is Vday .. wad a horrible day .. i tiink it was created 2 remind ppl abt how lonely they are .. how nicee, not .. as u may have guessed, i m dateless .. yes, unbelievable(hehe) but true .. oh well, at least i have eldds 2 occupy my miind tmr .. :)

*n if i had wiings i wud fly
cos all tad i nid u are
n if the world caved in ard mii
2 u i'd still hOld on
cos u're all tad i beliff
n the one tadd created mii
JESUS, becOs of u
IM FREE!




[[sparrkles of lOve]]|
LOVE; most wonderful.

went 2 church .. sat in frOnt of lanz, hoshua n gang .. they were really noisy .. but it was fun .. lanz n joshua look super cute!! aaahh! i miz goin out with ben, cheryl, joel, lanz n josh .. the first tym i went 2 escape was with them .. the first tym i went bowling was also with them .. n i knew lanz since i K2 n joshua since pri 1 .. cheryl n jOel when i was in sec 1 n ben tan when i was in pri 4 i tiink .. they were my childhood frenz .. n of course .. thr are my neighbours .. prema n thilaga .. i've known them since i was in pri 3 .. n me, philip, prema n jacob used 2 play at the playground downstairs everyday .. n i used 2 wear all these spagetti tops n mini skirts .. n when i fell down frm rollerbladiing, my skirt wud lfy up .. n despite the hot n humid weather, i always left my hair down .. n it was pretty long back den ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

6 simple facts:

Don't store things in your heart, because it's painful and devastating when you release it.
Don't be a bitter person, because this springs from having a resentful spirit.
Don't discount people's emotions or feelings just because they don't show it to you.
Don't reveal too much of the darker side of yourself because it might overwhelm others.
Don't raise your voice at other people because they do not deserve to be treated that way.
And lastly, don't expect too much of people because you're probably bound to get disappointed.


Love has to be demonstrated; it's not about the thought that counts, because it doesn't and it proves nothing.


went out with jac 2dae .. went 2 more den words .. its a shop, btw .. got a new wallet .. the wallet is pretty cool .. got a bunch of stuff 4 camp toO .. i still dun feel 2 good .. the sadness is still lingering thr waiting 2 engulf mii .. but i refuse 2 be sad .. im not gonna waste my tym being sad .. no way .. im gonna let go n move on .. n it seems 2 be doing the trick .. i nvr thot it'd be tis ez .. n i doubt it'll REMAIN tis ez .. i'll have 2 prepare myself 2 see u on monday .. i can do tiis .. im not angry with u, so i shall juz treat you normally .. i decided 2 act n maturely n not be childish .. i decided tad i'm not gonna give u the satisfaction of seeing mii get hurt anymore ..

anw, back 2 wad i did 2dae .. jac was realli lame .. she was lyk laffing so many tyms 4 no apparent reason .. n now, im sitting in front of the comp feeling bored n hungry .. juz changed my taggie 2 a doodle board n i also changed the skin abit ..

from now on, my role model is joey .. why joey?
because:
- he speaks GREAT english (u shld read his blogg .. its in my liinks)
- he's a talented singer
- he's the worship leader of R-AGE
- he plays the guitar
- he's a good soccer player
- he's the captain of team R-AGE
- he loves GOD
- u can see GOD working through him
- he's a GREAT mc
- he's got great leadership qualities
- he's considerate n kind
- people instantly lyk him
- he's a people person

dun mistake mii n tink tad i have a crush on him .. cos i dun .. yea .. i tiink tis entry is long enuff oredi .. so toOdles ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

Through It All
by Hillsong United

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness

And I look to You
And I wait on You

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all

You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness

And I look to You
And I wait on You

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all

Everlasting Father, I love You
Ever living Savior, I love You

Everlasting Father, I love You
Ever living Savior, I love You

I'll sing to You Lord
A hymn of Love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all


tis sOng realli touches my heart n though everytiing in life seems sucky now, i noe tad GOD will ALWAYS be thr 4 mii no matter wadd .. no matter how bad or sinful i've been .. n i realli nid him in my life rite now .. cos im goin 2 through one of my hardest stage in life so far n my life is in a HUGE mess .. n i seriously mean HUGE .. i realli nid sumone 2 shower mii with love .. n i noe GOD will always love mii n shower mii with love .. thank u JESUS .. i love u .. :)


i wanna thank amrit 4 trying 2 inject sum life in2 mii also .. its great 2 have frenz who dun wanna see u upset .. especially when the sacrifice their eyes juz 2 see u smile .. haha .. n i wanna say thx also iza n nadzi 4 bein the greatest frenz a gal could ever want .. being a true fren 2 mii n totally understanding mii, listening 2 mii constantly whine n being a great pillar of support ..



*emOtionally draiined__
LOVE; most wonderful.

i noe everytiing .. im juz waiting 4 u 2 come find mii, sit mii down n explain everyting 2 mii .. tell mii wad u have kept in ur heart .. tell mii wad u nvr told mii .. im curious .. n im hurt .. but im ok .. seriously .. i juz nvr expected it 2 turn out tis way .. im not angry .. im 2 tired 2 feel angry .. its not as if tis is the 1st tym .. but tis is the final straw .. i refuse 2 let my heart be broken again .. i refuse 2 cry .. but i nvr believed a word u said .. i nvr trusted u .. im not as gullible as u tiink .. all the lies juz din match up .. thr were sum missing peices .. im siick of all these lies .. would everyone PLEASE stop lying 2 mii? its seriously, of no use .. no kidding .. cos in the end, i will find out everytiing .. so y waste both my tym n urs?



Its been 5 months, since you went away
Left without a word, nothing to say (nothing to say)
When I was the one who gave you my heart and soul
But it wasn't good enough for you, oh no, so I asked god

God send me an angel from the heavens above
Send me an angel to heal my broken heart
From being in love
Cause all I do is cry
God send me an angel to wipe these tears from my eyes

And I know it might sound crazy,
But after all that I still loved you
You wanna come back in my life
But now there's something that I have to do
I have to tell the one that I once adored
That they cant have my love no mo
My heart cant take no more lies
And my eyes are all out of cries, so god

God send me an angel from the heavens above
Send me an angel to heal my broken heart
From being in love
Cause all I do is cry (all I do is cry)
God send me an angel to wipe these tears from my eyes
(send me an angel)

Now you had me on my knees
Begging god please to
Send you back to me
I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep
And you made me feel like I could not breathe
When I, all I wanted to do was feel your touch
And to give you all of my love (give you all of my love)
But you took my love for granted
Want my luvin now but you cant have it, oh god

God send me an angel from the heavens above
Send me an angel to heal my broken heart
From being in love
Cause all I do is cry ( is cry)
God send me an angel to wipe these tears from my eyes

Ohh ohh god send me, god send me an angel
An angel
Wipe the tears from my eyes
Send me an angel from the heavens above
Send me an angel, god send me an angel
From being in love
Send me an angel
Oh god
Send me an angel


-amanda perez- angel



*it was all a bunch of liies__
LOVE; most wonderful.

I sit alone
In a dark theater watching the people go by
Hand in hand, everybody but me

I stay behind
Watching the credits roll by
Roll Roll roll right by me

I know I won't cry
Because there is somebody somebody somebody waiting for me
Out in the rain
Won't cry, not tonight
'Cause there is somebody waiting for me

Oh, yeah won't cry

I take a walk
The streets are busy tonight
And I am searching for you
Waiting to brush your shoulder

And I'm alone
I watch the faces roll by
Roll Roll Roll right by me

But I know I won't cry
'Cause there is somebody somebody somebody waiting for me
Out in the rain
Won't cry, not tonight
'Cause there is somebody waiting for me

How many words will go unspoken oh
Til I hear you knocking upon my door
I just got this magic spell unbroken
But tonight I know I won't cry no more

I lie awake
I left the porch light on
I hope it helps you to find your way

Outside I hear the thunder roll by
Roll Roll roll right by me
But I know I won't cry

'Cause there is somebody somebody somebody waiting for me
Out in the rain
I'm not gonna cry tonight
No, 'cause there is somebody waiting for me
Not gonna cry tonight
Not gonna no, no no no
Oh, yeah
No, not gonna cry, not tonight
'Cause there is somebody waiting for me

I stay behind
Watching the credits roll by
Roll Roll roll right by me

bOnnie mckee- sOmebody



*sumtyms, its amazingg hwo much songgs can relate so much 2 ur life .. :)
LOVE; most wonderful.

nooo! argh! i juz typed out sum stuff n i accidently hit the esc button n *poOf!* its gone .. haiz .. anw, i was saying tad the chinese holiday is finally of sum use 2 mii .. can wake up when i wan 4 the next 2 days .. rejoice! been givin a ton of advice 2 iza these past few weeks .. how can i give her advice when i cant even follow my own advice when it comes 2 matters on lurve? tad is if i have any matters on lurve .. n its so unfair tad she has ppl 2 help her trOugh tis n i din have .. oh well .. im sort of stuckk in the middle of nadzi n iza .. as in i understandd how iza feels n i oso noe how nadzii feels .. its kind of weird .. maybe i have tis sensitivity tingy cos i have been surrounded with so many frenz who have gone through relationships n come 2 mii 2 tell me abt it or 2 seek advice .. sumtyms, i wish tad i was obliviOus 2 wad other ppl do .. tad im slow n not understand wads goin on with my frenz love lives .. ok .. wadever im typing sounds confusing .. haha .. i dun realli noe how 2 express wad im feeling in wordds u see .. so juz tahan with me lar .. im so tired now .. wasnt planning 2 update my blog .. but im so bored! buddha seems 2 have changed .. or isit juz tad he lurves 2 see mii get pissed? he kips insulting mii .. horrible .. so sarcastic .. he wasnt lyk tad 2 mii b4 n its freakin mii out .. seriOusly .. wads tis tingg with guys tryin 2 get mii irritated juz 2 see the way i'll react? its freaky ok .. aldrin, amrit, buddha n a few more .. crazy ppl .. n i realise tad the only tym buddha realli talkks muchh on the fone is when he's enjoying himself insulting mii .. maybe his chicken pox has screwed up his brain .. yea .. tad shld be the reason ... i hope .. anw, i'll take the insults as longg as he's enjoying himself .. *roll eyes* my mum hasnt been cooking .. n since all the chinese ppl went home early 4 the chinese new year tingy, most of the shops were closed .. n i am starvingg! argh! im so hungry now ok .. n my parents wun let mii go 2 shop at tis tym of the nite .. so its juz mii, a couple of eggs n maggi mee .. wow! dunno wad crap 2 write anymore so yea .. bye ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

ok .. buddha .. i admit i was a teeny weeny bit pissed with u cos 4 all the 3 tyms tad i came online u were dunnO doin wadd .. n when i was pissed n i nided sumone 2 talkk 2, u werent thr .. summore tadd wai hoo .. aiyo .. he still wanna lie 2 mii .. so irritating .. i tell him oredi tad i noe wadds gOin on .. n he still dun wanna admit .. idiOt .. den tad troy another one .. wahh .. he realli pissed me off man .. anw, now i feel badd .. maybe i over reacted .. troy, if u're reading tis sorie .. god .. i sound lyk iza .. anw .. yea .. i din mean 2 loose my temper .. but u dunn noe me den u any how say .. it was insulting ok .. nvm .. im gOnna slp now .. gud nite ppl ...
LOVE; most wonderful.

"he made tears roll downn ur cheeks," him

"i noe, but despite tad i still lyk him," mii

"u shld 4get him. how many tyms has he hurt u oredi?" him

"i dunno y i still lyk him oso. its weirdd. i lyk him as much as u lyk her. maybe even more." mii

reminder 2 myself: u're not mine n u'll nvr be .. sadd but true .. everytym i see u down, i wanna wrap my arms ard u n hold u n tell u tad everyting will be alrite n tad if u ever have a problem u can tell me despite how mad i am at u .. but i cant .. cos u're not mine .. everytym sumone teases me, i wanna say "yea, he's my boyfriend." n grin at them stupidly .. haha .. but i cant .. cos u're not minee .. everytym i see u eith her, i wanna tell her, "heyy! backk off! he doesnt lyk u." but i cant .. cos u're not minee .. but how i wishh u were ...


im fine, dun wOrry*

LOVE; most wonderful.

went 2 church 2dae .. yes i did .. serious .. actually, was planning 2 skip church .. but cheryl called me n asked me if i was comingg ..

me, "erm ..."

she, "hannah! u promised 2 come."

so i was lyk ok, fine n i went .. n im gladd i did .. it was super fun .. it was praise n worship sunday .. so it was all singing .. super cool .. singing in church is the only tym when im singing without feeling so conscious .. haha .. the worship was realli great .. i was touched by the spirit .. it all happened when they played tis video n it reminded me of Jesus dying on the cross juz 4 mii .. n i started crying juz lyk tad .. at 1st, i refused 2 cry .. but later, when the resumed the worship n we sang tis song, at the foot of the cross, i was deeply touched .. n regina, seh went up n said tad God was looking closely at tis grp of ppl .. n tis grp of ppl are the ones who have strayed away frm God .. n they say tad they'll come backk 2 God when they're ready 2 do quiet tym .. or when they're ready 2 quit their badd habits .. but God say tad he doesnt care abt tad .. he juz wants these ppl 2 come backk 2 him .. rite now .. n den pastor ronald said, "if u are one of those ppl, den take the next step. come 4ward n kneal down b4 God." at 1st i refused 2 move .. but seeing other ppl having so muchh courage 2 move 2 the front touched me n before i knew it, i was kneeling down n i juz broke down .. the tears juz came .. n mel came n prayed 4 me .. n i juz sat thr crying .. later, she oso gave me a hugg ..n everyone was praising God in different wayys .. everyone seems so happy n warm .. lyk when i came in, i din noe we were gonna be sitting on the floor .. i was lyked freaked cos i was wearing a skirt .. n den joel offered his bag .. i was so touched .. i mean he's so swit .. n den i decided 2 go n sit on a chair instead n en zhen came n lent me his jacket .. haha .. so i could sit on the flOor in the endd .. i guess i was realli tOuched by God n i could feel how muchh he loves mii .. :)


anw, u still haven answered my question! hello! do u love torturing me? mind games aint funny my dear .. i wan my answer! haha ..


got tOtally freaked juz now when patheebun asked my 4 my number .. i asked him wad he wanted it 4 .. n he said 2 talk lar .. den he asked me 2 call him .. n i was lyk freakin out TOTALLY .. so i went 2 syed 2 ask him wadd 2 do .. n tad buddha, he was playin cs .. so useless .. so i ended up fending patheebun of by myself .. haha ..


iza seems 2 be listening 2 me .. good 4 her .. i hope tinggs wOrk out well .. n wai hoo sux man! muahaha ..


ytd, i was lookin through my church frenz bloggs .. n i was at jOey's blogg .. man! jOey is lyk my idol .. haha .. he's suchh a devited christian .. he's a GREAT mc .. he's super talented .. he's cute .. n he's so fun n optimistic .. i can pratically see God in him .. plus, he's blogg is super cool .. he uses fantabulous english .. http://captaincramp.blogspot.com/ .. tads his blog .. boy, how i wishh i could be juz lyk him .. haha ..


i shall leave u alonee 4 now .. buti may come backk 2 irritate u all again later .. muahaha! wad the hell?! tis is my blogg anw .. so i can do wadever i lyk .. haha .. :)
LOVE; most wonderful.

was thr a miscommunicatiOn? hmmm .. i asked u tad question .. n i saidd tad if u din say anyting, i wud take it as a no .. but if u come n tell me den its a yes .. n den u gave me "kiss" .. n when i said tad u haven answered my question u said tad if u din answer den wad wud it mean .. cos u had 2 go, i din ask u .. but im seriously confused .. haha .. is it a yes or a no? tell u wad .. if im not online when u're online tmr, juz tagg my board with a simple yes or no .. n plz leave ur name so i noe its u .. :) im so disappointed in iza .. haiz .. i talked 2 her abt tis matter b4 .. makes no diff 2 her i guess .. she still behaves the same .. i juz wish u'd stop bein so freakin selfish n tink abt other ppl's feelings 4 once .. wake up! thr r other ppl who r more beautiful den u .. n u wun always have the upper handd .. eventually u're gonna fall .. n when u're fall all those ppl tad u hurt r gOnna standd thr n laff at u ..
LOVE; most wonderful.

sumtyms, the tinggs tad sum of my frenz do truly amazes me .. i realli feel lyk giving up on her .. she may tinkk tad wad she's doin is rite becOs she's helping sumone .. but doesnt she realise tad she's oso hurting sumone else? juz becos she's pretty, she takes advantage of it .. true beauty cOmes frm within .. n usually, its ur close frenz who see ur inner beauty while the rest of the world looks at u n falls 4 u .. tokin 2 her doesnt seem 2 make muchh of diff .. she still acts the same .. its as if its a habit .. juz lyk a drug .. flirting has already become part of her lifestyle .. its sadd .. n sumtyms, it realli turns me off when i see her behavingg tad way .. as i look ard n see guyys slowly falling 4 her, i wonder if i'd ever meet a guyy who has nvr fallen 4 her n treats her juz the way he treats everyone else .. who sees her 4 who she really is .. so far, i've onli seen 3 or 4 guys .. 3 or 4 .. how pathetic cann tad get? all the other guyys give in 2 her whimps n fancies .. al she has 2 do is whine or juz flash them a smile .. n they obey her .. juz lyk doggs dun u tinkk? haiz .. nvm ...


LOVE; most wonderful.

2dae had el after skl .. it was tiring but kind of fun .. den came home at 4 n helped iza change her blogg skin .. aint i swit? haha .. nthin much 2 write 2dae lar .. u still haven answered my question .. im waiting ok .. im prepared 4 the wOrse lar .. i wun realli mind if u dun lyk me anymOre .. cos i realise tad having u as a fren is more important 2 me .. yea .. tads pretty much it .. anw, u all shld listen 2 sum 41's peices .. its realli nicee .. when i was walkin hOmee 2dae, i saw a gal n a guy frm henderson sec .. they were in lower sec .. n they were walkingg through the parkk .. den the guyy toOk the galz handd n they cOntinued walking .. it was so swit n cutee .. haiz .. madee me feel sadd 4 a mOment .. haha .. lame mann .. den when i tink abt my frenz, they all seem so happi .. iza, mateen, aldrin, alyssa, syafiq .. they all found th ppl they lyk .. n me? wad abt me? im lyk so laggy man .. my bro has lyk a gazillion ex steads n me? i dun even have one .. how pathetic cann tad get? n he's yOunger den me! *whines* oh well .. lyk i said, im destined 2 be a nun .. haha .. so rejOice .... -.-'''
LOVE; most wonderful.

had eldds training in henderson cc 2dae .. was pretty fun .. had 2 run the stoopid 2.4 2dae .. AGAIN .. lyk ytd wasnt enuff .. *roll eyes* at 1st tad kwan (he so acts cute) said tad we muz run within 17 min n 30 sec .. den tad stoOpid janice dunno do wadd den he changed it 2 17 min .. KNN .. i was freakin pissed man .. den when i finish, it was 17.10 .. 17.10!! argh! 10 secs onli lor .. i wud have passed if it werent 4 tad idiot janice .. so ran the blady ting again 2dae .. n tis tym the tyming was 18.55 .. hehe .. wad?! i HATE running ok .. no! not hate- detest! ok .. my current fav sayin Ow is, "i am a fower, u are a bee. u are attracted 2 me!" hehe .. i noe its lame .. but yea .. who realli cares? oooo .. i've missed u lyk so muchh! though its so not obvious .. i din realise how much i missed talkin 2 u, lookin at u n smiling at u .. haha .. n i especially missed all the smiles u gave me .. ok .. tis is so crappy! haha .. but basically i've missed u .. n i noe i shldnt be feeling tis or telling u tis cos its seriously not good 4 me n my health .. n juz tinkin tad u actually mite lyk her makes me wanna kill myself n YOU .. especially her .. but i cant .. cos its a serious crime .. :) n i cant stop u frm lykin her .. wich i seriously tink is a bad chOice .. n juz tinkin abt u n her sitting 2gether n doin god noes wadd in bio cls is even wOrse .. so fuck u! argh! haha .. nvm .. i m a calm persOn .. lame rite? ok .. back 2 happier issues .. i have no vday datee!! ok ... tadds not exactly a happy issue either .. since im pathetic n destined 2 be a nun .. oh well .. *sigh* if sumone askes me out 4 a date on vday, i tell u, i will jump dOwn ar .. i m so boredd now .. n hungry .. ooo! n guess wadd?? i toOk a pic with fiq 2dae .. n its quite nice .. wanted 2 take a pic with lord buddha .. but he had gone 4 soccer .. so .. yea .. the pathetic n bOred me shall leave u all in peace now .. bye ...
LOVE; most wonderful.

had a tOtally relaxed day 2dae .. weeee! but tad thng simply cudnt resist the urge .. n she HAD 2 give us loads of maths sums 2 do duringg cls .. bitch .. hmph! ytd in cls we were playin tis game lar .. its the one whr u hold the handd of the person who u are gonna challenge n u play scissors papar stone .. the winner gets to whack the loser's hand .. im pretty good at the scissors paper stone part .. but other ppl are so much better at the whacking .. especially the guyys .. so ms nim (she's a realli cOol relieve teacher) oranised the whole ting n we played lar .. den i was the final gal left .. but over all, the champion was none other den ... *drum roll* melvin!!! den after skl, had 2 stay backk 2 finish my maths .. n den got real pissed .. due 2 sum reasons .. den angie n her fren joyce were lyk super nice .. especially angie .. the helped me with my maths .. aaaw! swit eh? haha .. den when finished left skl .. went 2 tiong n slacked .. sum drunken man came n talk 2 us .. n nadzi got irritated n stormed off .. den we wanna leave lidat den saw my neighbours .. sway sway, they dragg me 2 raffles place .. took 851 .. got down at city hall .. KNN .. walked all the way 2 raffles place .. can u imagine how my feet are aching now? :) den while we were walkin, we saw sum artefacts .. statues lar .. n it was by sum artist who, lyk how 2 say ar? when he drew tings or ppl, he made them look realli bigg n fat .. so 2 all the perverted ppl out thr, tis is definitely a place 2 go cos the statues were of naked women! i onli saw one man n a chick .. but the rest were women .. lyk how coOl cann tad get? *rolls eyes* its sumwhr near the esplanade .. den we took the mrt back 2 tiOng .. n so sway leh! happen 2 see syed lor .. i was realli shocked .. haha .. dun ask me y .. but i was freaked! hahaha .. lame .. yes, i noe .. so in a state of panick, my brain made me lift my handd n wave at him .. n he wah .. so nice .. wave backk at me .. but nvr even smile .. den the face oso lyk not happy 2 see me .. nvm nvm .. haiz .. i so nicee wave at him .. den he wave backk budden the facee lyk not happy 2 see mee .. im so sadd .. hehehe .. ok .. contradicting myself by sayin im sadd n den laffing .. hehe .. yes .. i tinkk tis enrty is 2 longg oredi .. so i shall stOp here .. toOdles .. n plz, try not 2 miz me 2 muchh eh? haha .. k .. tad was so bitchy! blahh! :)))
LOVE; most wonderful.