xmas eve: had and ice cream buffet at haagen dazs courtesy of our dear melvin. after that, the whole group of us went over to ling's playground and played games and opened presents. stayed until pretty late.
xmas day: went to visit my grandma and aunt in bedok. the same as every year.
boxing day: had work. got my mind off him for hours. felt so happy and great. had supper with tiger and ling then we took a slow walk home.
today: met iza, xinni and jacq in heeren. bought a pair of converse shoes. i think they're pretty cool. all of us except jacq bought a pair of shoes. bought a skirt and a pair of jeans too. he got me all pissed and annoyed. i cant wait to get over him.
i've never loved this much. i've never regretted this much. i've never cried so much. i've never wanted and yearned this much. i've never hurt this much.
i can see you falling in love with her even if you try to hide it from me. the anger and hurt is killing me. the past seems so unreal, like it never happened. pictures and thoughts of you bring tears to my eyes. i just miss you so much. i hate feeling so miserable and pathetic. moving on seems like such an easy thing for you to do. those fifteen months have just faded into the past havent they? i have never felt so alone before. "how could you move on so fast?" "how could you fall out of love so fast?" "how could you like someone else so fast?" those Qs keep banging around in my head. and the worst Q of all, "how am i gonna face you in school?"
i thought maybe, just maybe we might still have a chance. that when school repens and we see each other you might realise that this was all a big mistake. but now, i just want to kick myself hard for even having that slightest bit of hope cos your closeness to her just makes that impossible.
it's my fault. i made the biggest mistake. but you have to understand that i wouldnt have undone those two weeks cos that's when i realised how important you were to me. how much i love you and needed you.
sigh. its my fault.
LOVE; most wonderful.
Sunday, December 24, 2006 @ 4:55 PM
hannah loves you all! (:
i've been MIA for so long. i couldnt even be bothered to visit my own blog and yet you all still visit. lovess.
this whole month has been sooo eventful. there's been like major changes. i'm going up to sec 5. my results were frigging good, by my standard. the worse is i lost the one i love; the one i spent fifteen unforgettable months with. but the best is i've made a whole bunch of new friends. they best part is most of my close friends are working with me too!
this month has been a roller coaster ride of emotions for me. i was sad and depressed for awhile den so so happy the next day. i really wish the holidays would last longer.
yesterday ahgong brought me, ling and xinni to swensen. he's really the greatest, this ahgong of mine. :D
been shopping for xmas presents like mad recently. bought like 200bucks worth of xmas present. i'll be going out soon so maybe, just maybe i'll update later.
merry eve of xmas! (:
i still miss you.
LOVE; most wonderful.
hello x)
seventeen is just a test
i would recommend
that you live with no regrets
and even if it seems
like the world is crashing on you
you shouldn't let it hold you down
it shouldnt hold you back
dont worry you'll show them
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hannah
seventeen
ganengsengschool sec5b draaama anglican high school
br>
